![]() When the boys were toddlers, Lynda took photos of them in the bathtub, Nik's arms wrapped around Zach. Theirs was a childhood filled with those small acts of love. Zach's only memory of his dad was the way Roger would lift him up, set his little feet on top of his own and dance around the room. Zach was just 4 when he died, leaving their family without his income and steadying presence. She did not tell the boys they were adopted until they were in middle school, long after Roger suffered a fatal heart attack in 2004. Zach's caramel skin and thick curls made him assume his father was black. Nik was always pale, with light brown eyes and straight hair. The brothers looked almost nothing alike. Seventeen months later, when they learned Nik's biological mom had given birth again, they took in Zachary, too. Lynda and Roger Cruz had adopted Nik first, when he was an infant. He brought it home to the five-bedroom house in Parkland where the boys were being raised and spray-painted it gold. Skating had been Zach's escape since the day his mom, Lynda Cruz, relented at a garage sale and bought him his first board. He knew the curve of the skate park's dips and lifts, the sound his board made as it grinded against metal, the sting of a wipeout that meant he'd almost landed his trick. 14, 2018, in the place he could almost always be found. And every few minutes, Zach looked up again, hoping his brother would acknowledge that he was still here. "I'm stuck between loving him and hating him because of what he did." To distance himself was to abandon the only real family he has left. To support Nik was to forever tie himself to the heinous crime his brother admitted to committing. But unlike for the relatives of the Columbine, Virginia Tech and Sandy Hook shooters, his brother, for now, was still alive. Zach alone had joined the growing collective of people whose siblings or children became mass shooters. He and Nik never knew their biological parents, and their adoptive parents were dead. Zach looked back down at his skateboarding shoes. "We're coming up on the anniversary of this incident." The state of Florida, renowned for imposing death sentences, was seeking one for 20-year-old Nik. "We would like to have a trial date to work toward," a prosecutor was telling the judge. But Nik's head was turned to the side, facing away from him. Zach noticed his hair had been buzzed short again. ![]() For this January hearing, Nik was wearing new glasses. He craned his neck to get a better view of his brother. In the months since, Zach had been ostracized by his community, involuntarily confined to a psychiatric facility, arrested twice, kicked out of his guardian's home, taken in by strangers who moved him 900 miles north to Virginia, and blamed, not so much by others but by himself. Zachary Cruz was 17 when his older brother became one of the deadliest school shooters in American history. Some of those people were here in the courtroom, and sliding into a bench beside them now was another person whose life was derailed that day. Hundreds more had their lives upended: parents suddenly without children, students rallying for gun control by day and dealing with panic attacks at night, first responders denounced for the choices they made amid the chaos. Seventeen others were injured, left with lasting scars, physical and mental. There in a red jumpsuit was his brother, Nikolas Cruz, who had confessed to carrying out a massacre at his former high school.įourteen students and three staff members were killed that Valentine's Day at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High in Parkland, Florida. They stepped aside and he stepped into the courtroom. Out the elevator, down the hall, past the news reporters and up to the doors guarded by sheriff's deputies. But for his brother, he had come back again and again. He tugged at his tie, the one he'd borrowed because he forgot his suit. ![]() ![]() He emptied his pockets at security and hustled onto the elevator. BROWARD COUNTY - He kept his head down as he walked into the judicial complex, knowing his presence would attract stares. ![]()
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